I’ve failed to cut back on amphetamine consumption. The substance that I currently abuse is touted to be one of low-potential. Therefore, my abuse of this prescribed drug is counterintuitive, and should’ve never happened in the first place. By taking more than prescribed, the duration of negative effects is elongated.
There are only 9 doses remaining. I tried to use a solution of water to split and increase the number of remaining doses only to repeat the same mistake. It is time to stop taking this drug and seek alternative forms of medicine.
I’ve started to see a social worker. I have omitted many significant events of hospitalizations and drug abuse which breaches the level of trust that can be established. There is only a year remaining to benefit from being on my parents’ insurance. I do not want to waste my time as the rest of my life depends on the decisions I make within the next year.
We are meeting weekly this month. The last session, she suggested that I take walks around a park. While walking, I should focus on my five senses; using the bilateral movements to exercise and stimulate my brain. I see this as rudimentary and depressing, yet I have not been taking care of myself.
I have an interview on 2/6 at another grocery store.
I’m not sure what I’m going to do. I took another 2 doses around 3pm. I’ve been mindlessly collecting pornographic media for the last several hours. I know I won’t be sleeping tonight.
I need to start running. This week, no excuses. I will try to wake early enough to do so.
I’m getting tired of this routine. The high is already a low and I do not look forward to the coming weeks.
bumisdum.com 